I have moved home about 45 times so far…Army child, Army soldier, and then I seem to have continued the theme but moved more since leaving the forces. It doesn’t make endings easier, just gives me more experience with them. I exit with kindness and grace…thankfully as some tyrant bosses I went on to work with again! As Karen indicates in this blog, you have a moment in time with people. Some accept this and let go when its over. Some find it harder and stay in touch until that moment you both realise its only that moment you had in common. A rare few are lifelong friends and it seems I can pick these relationships back up as if no time passed between when I finally get any free time.
I have noticed that it is always easier to leave than have someone leave. If they leave, I am left with the memories being constantly reminded of their absence as I continue my work as before. Eventually the void gets filled with something new. When I leave I have the stimulus of something new and this keeps me occupied and perhaps delaying the emotional feelings, which come eventually. If I am not enjoying the new chapter, I used to go back like the Great Gatsby and try to repeat the past, then I realised life moved on without me there.
Embracing the present is good advice, as is embracing your feelings on goodbyes and endings. Feel them and they are released.
How are you with goodbye’s?
Saying goodbye is the hardest thing that most of us do. Endings by definition are final and are therefore something that most of us find difficult.
“How lucky I am to have something that makessaying goodbyeso hard.”
So with theendingof my time in Somerset just round the corner I have been saying goodbye to people that I have become close to -new friends and colleagues, people that I see every-day– and- of course -the clients that I have worked with over the last few years.It is tough, but I feel ok with the sadness that this brings.
Relationships end all the time and most often we don’t have the ability to choose how to end relationships. People stop turning up, stop responding to communications. People fade away, people move, or other things happen that prevent the relationship from ending the way…
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